Mike blames Paul for the slow pace. Mike: Hey Paul what's up? Paul: Quit talking to me, I'm better than you now. Mike: What are you talking about man? Paul: God, if I'm seen with you none of my PhD buddies will talk to me. Mike: Shouldn't you just be friends with people you enjoy? Paul: You're so dumb! No wonder you aren't in my program. Mike: Come on man, that's not cool. Paul: No, what isn't cool is only having one graduate degree. Mike: Can we just be play football? Paul: No, since I'm better than all of you I will make you play as slowly as I want. Mike: But that's not cool man. Paul: I don't care. I only care about me! Mike: What happened to you Paul? We used to be so close. Paul: Don't look at me!! NEVER LOOK AT ME!!!!!!!!! Mike: Note- The aforementioned conversation may not have actually happened.